FF

I may have fucked up. But don´t you people dare judge me. You would have done it, too. You all would have done it too.

I´m a selfish little bitch. That´s right.

Cuando a una guitarra se le rompe una cuerda, hay que cambiarlas todas. Espero que la cuerda que se le rompió hoy a mi guitarra no sea una metáfora sobre nosotros.

Adele, I really need your guidance right now. Thanks.

I hated today. It was supposed to be a good one.

I need to fix this. But, do I want to?

I want to fix this. But, do I need to?

How do you know? And then, how do you do it?

Soy una loca, insensible de mierda.

No entiendo. No entiendo cómo un día una está demasiado segura de lo que quiere y un empujoncito te hace dudarlo todo. No entiendo.

Nunca me voy a perdonar dudarnos.

Please... bring him back. Get back. Come back to me. My lips and arms are waiting for you/him. 

I don´t want to have to look back and say "what if."

I am sorry. I am so, so, so sorry.

Why do I keep doing this to myself? Why do I self sabotage?! WHY?!

No entiendo un coño. De pana. No me entiendo un coño.

El tiempo es un pajúo, nunca me ha ayudado a solucionar nada. Pero ahorita, es donde está puesta toda mi esperanza. Mi corazón viaja y avanza a su compás.

Play me like a piano. I´ll dance to your beat.

Trust me. TRUST ME, trust me when I don´t trust myself and I don´t know if I did the right thing. Trust me as I trusted up until a few hours ago that it would all be OK. That we would find our way back into each other´s lives.

Please trust me.

Don´t trust me. I´m a heartless bitch who doesn´t deserve a man like the one you can be.

Or the one you were when I fell in love with you.

I DON´T KNOW.

And it kills me. K-i-l-l-s me.

Como nunca había sacrificado tanto por amor no me había dado cuenta de que había cruzado la raya hace tiempo. La fina línea que divide a las mujeres enamoradas de las pajúas.

Estábamos arando en el mar? El mar puede convertirse en tierra? No arena casual. Tierra. Tierra donde por lo menos pueda haber gramita. No necesito un roble, ni un samán. Ni siquiera una palmera. Me sirve que sea grama, si la grama es nuestra. Tuya y mía. De los dos. Atendida por sus propios dueños todos los días.

If I didn´t love you I wouldn´t be crying.

The love. The life. The plans. The plans with the love of my life.

You will not understand this. And you will get mad. Again, I´m sorry.

I am doing this for us. For me. For you. In that order.

I need to be happy, so I can make you happy. And I don´t think I´m happy. No.

I´d love to be PMSing. That would probably justify this. But I´m not PMSing.

Please don´t hate me. Por favor, no me odies.

Where are you? I lost you. Either you changed or you hid that man from me. He eventually shows up. But eventually is not enough.

Please say you just hid him and he´ll be back. He went for a walk and he should be here any minute, yes.

Orilla de mierda, dónde estás? Dónde estás? No me quiero ahogar en el camino.

I wished you could be inside my head. Inside my heart.

I can´t say anything. My head and my back and my heart all hurt.

I´m sorry, again.

Te amo.